I am doing okay. I hate relying on reminiscence though. It's starting to slur the lines between what I want and reality.
It's caused me to be so bi-polar these past few days. During the day, I am so self-sufficient and then nighttime hits or I will be in a certain environment and I will miss him all over again.
Especially when I am in my own bed and the streaks of light from outside shaves the top of my loft with all these images and memories.
I just want to get to the point where my heart has caught up with my mind. I just need time.
Tonight I went downtown to the Pickford by myself to photograph this film showing and book signing of this really awesome author/illustrator named Brian Selznick.
Selznick writes these amazing children's books, and illustrates them like graphic novels.
I picked one of them up from the library today, "The Invention of Hugo Cabaret." I hope it occupies my mind so that the sounds of my roommate and her boyfriend do not.
Ladies and gentle-men, all I know is that Spring Break is going to be so therapeutic. Going to Brooklyn and exploring the veins of the city through the subway with a camera and the warmth of my friends is all the medicine I need now. Honestly.
It's that thuggish ruggish bone. I don't want to lose who I am.